To fear something is to reject nature.This aversion we have to some thing that presents itself is as unnatural as having an aversion to our own breathing. Because nature has granted both an audience with us each of them they must carry equal weight. But to treat one as something awful while barely acknowledging the other is a fallacy. 

I felt fear today, not for life or death but for the loss of such a small thing as a rented room. In a moment my base nature presented itself and I lost sight of my reason. It was terrifying, and only after remembering the exercises I had learned did it subside in me and the overwhelming burden of false impression left me. It highlighted deep holes in my study. Things thought to have been learned only surface teachings. The marrow is still raw and untrained. I sit in the comfort of a chair, lit by electricity and warmed by heat and pretend to know fear, pain and impression. I must seek more tests, I must seek practice in reason, practice in my use of impressions and judgments and action. In short I am only a student and nowhere near the master I want to be. 


Comments are closed